North Sleezeborough

""This place is the hip place. It's where the cool skateboarders and rappers in the 90s wound up hanging. Now they're still trendy but in a 2010s way. They make bitcoin transactions on their smart devices in coffee shops and listening to their favorite album, The Click by AJR, on Spotify. Of course very few of them have jobs, because they make all their money selling bullshit on Etsy or crafting evil GoFundMe scams. It would be very fun to kill some of these bitches with some acidic slime.""

- Niboe

Channel Description
A modest little borough with a few trendy shops and cafes starting to pop up here and there.

!Look Message
Sleepy brownstone apartments and about 50,000 different terrible pizza places populate this slow paced, gentrifying district. Outdoor malls have started to spring up here and there, mostly around the college campus of Neo Milwaukee State. Retired parents rest on benches, throwing crumbs of bread at birds and squandering the twilight years of their misspent life. Students with curious facial hair and suspenders lurk in vinyl record stores and horde ironic knick-knacks.

North Sleezeborough residents really, really don't care about anything. It wouldn't be fair to call them nihilistic, that implies self-reflection or philosophical quandary, they are just so lethargic that they might as well categorically be considered legally dead. Alongside these generally older occupants are younger students who have flocked to the dirt cheap public college of Neo Milwaukee State to continue their mediocre education.

Previous !Look Message
Young jobless adults walk around in plaid and suspenders with curious facial hair, stopping into the occasional store front to buy a vinyl recording or an ironic knick-knack.

Neo Milwaukee State
An abysmally funded public college, with a student body of high school has-beens and future gas station attendants. With nearly a 100% acceptance rate, it's needless to say that the riff raff is not kept out of this seedy establishment. People are here to stumble through their meaningless lives, chasing normality and appeasing their poor parent's ideas of success by enrolling in the first college they get accepted to and walking out four years later with thousands of dollars of debt and a BA in English. No one here is excited to learn, no one is excited to teach, no one is excited for anything here. They all just want to die, and thankfully they will someday. Use '!help' to get info on game mechanics, or '!order' if you want to purchase a game guide.

Drive-By Drive-Thrus
This intersection is packed with every fast food chain you can name. You can't honestly expect the locals of North Sleezeborough to have the mental/physical capabilities of caring about anything enough to get out of their car to do it, so the front doors of these establishments are rusted over and boarded up, while the line for the drive-thru extends down the block. Of course, some of these cars aren't patiently waiting to acquire their extra large value meals, they're just itching to get to the window and rob the place blind, lest they get medieval on the teller's ass with their cruel and unusual instruments. Good times, good times.

WWW Ring
It's a big amphitheater with a Fighting Ring for a stage: The place where the Wowie Wowza Wrestling Circuit takes place. Founded on the very land the great West-East Gaijin War happened, it was once a great promotion for all the up and coming superstars of the city, like Stoned Cold Beer Monger and Musk Logan, but it became reduced to a bunch of retards in spandex slapping each other while completely drunk. It's not all bad for the dwindling crowds, as once in a green moon they get to see an extreme fit of rage or an aneurysm happen mid-show, which is extremely fucking funny.

Carbohydrate Containment Boulevard
As far as you can see the street is lined with pizza places of all shapes and sizes. Even more dwarfing than the amount of pie shops is the sweet smell of some piping hot slices that are ready to be devoured. Even just walking down this street is enough to punch you out of ketosis. The never-ending supply of grease and dough being funneled into the local's mouths keeps them fat and complacent.

Pond Scum Road
The street takes you next to a pond which looks as if it has seen better days. The surrounding grass is littered with trash long forgotten. The water seems to be much the same filled with half eaten pieces of bread, algae, and some other substances you can't quite identify. It looks like this place is often deserted even from the ducks.

Slob Plaza
It's the most bland square of land to ever be called a plaza, adorned by a couple of short trees, four pairs of benches each looking towards a different cardinal point, and a small, ugly dry fountain in the middle. Multiple magazines and renowned papers have called this spot number 1 in many "The best places to nap or fall dead" rankings, having mediocre ratings across the board since its inception. Here you can always find lazy citizens laying around, wishing their sorry lives could be magically solved, or, even better, that someone puts a bullet between those sleepy eyes.